Long ago one baby girl was born
and everybody was not that happy. But there was a person who brought the sweets
and celebrated. Shared his joy with every person in his village. His first
granddaughter had just arrived in his family. As he had no daughter, it was the
high time to share his happiness & joy.
Yes, today I’m writing about you
and you are my Baba. Mere Dada Jee.
Before this moment I never express my fondness for Baba to anyone
because I thought it was worthless however I was ridiculously wrong. Yes, I
know I am.
The matter of fact which I just
don’t want to accept that you are no more. It’s killing me because I’m so
deserted like never before. It’s shocking. It’s hurtful. It’s painful and it’s
heartbreaking.
I just don’t want to move on like
everybody is telling me to. Just three days
back everything was fine and a week prior to that I met you. You were sharing
the story of your childhood and the Satsang where you used to occupy yourself
since many years. You were in your room surrounded by all your grandchildren
along with my Husband. You were telling the history about Bind (our native
place), school and everything related to our village, our home especially to my
Husband. You were too happy and busy chatting with him. And your son-in-law was
having great time with you (as he told me).
Why have you waited for me?? Why
you were so happy that I am finally at your place after almost a year??
After marriage it was my first
visit to my native place. You were happy like no one else. You waited for me
whole day. And everybody was pissed that why are you asking so many times
that I’m coming or not coming and if yes then when I’ll reach home.
Finally I reached home and you
were standing far away from me. That bright eyes, that smile on your face and the
way you were looking at us. This was not new for me but this time it was
SPECIAL, a very special because it was not only me, it was us. Your most beloved
granddaughter is happily married and visited you first time after marriage.
You were bad to hide your
emotions. You were the young angry man, stubborn, hardworking, discipline
lover, a good singer and sometime a comedian. Everybody knows your daily Yoga & exercise sessions. And best n worst thing that you were a family
person. You gave your whole life to your family.
How can you go away like this?? How
could you know that you are here with us for few more days?? Why you were telling
my mom that stay here at home with you because you are going far away soon??
You gave me my Name. I was your Shraddha where everybody know me as
Sharda. I grew up following you at 24X7 basis. You guided me at every big steps,
in every big decisions of my life and understood my feelings and emotions. When
my father was busy with his business and for my younger siblings, you were
there. Yes, every time.
I know I’m brave, I’m strong enough
that I could do every impossible things alone that no one can expect but now
I’m lost. I don’t have courage to go home. I don’t want to go home and see my
family. I’m not that strong to see you dead.
No. No. No way why I’m crying
this much. Why is my heart so heavy?. Why can’t I control my tears?.
It’s all because of you Baba.
It’s only you. You were my energy warehouse. You were my life server room. You
were my discipline and self-control book.
I have never seen me like this
before. How will I go home next time knowing that I will not be able to see you
ever? Who will wait for me like you did. Who will happy to see me like you
was?? This thought is not going from my tiny head.
Sorry to all kids (my siblings) for
being selfish but he is my Baba yes only mine…and I can’t let you go like this…
LOVE YOU!!!!
Aloohaa !!!!!
